i am surprised i am writting again...
didnt i just finished the last post...what the hell.
but this time il have the letters in RED.no its not supposed to mean nethn.just visual effects,they are important,even in case of an useless cathartic blog.

lets talk/write/discuss/argue bout TATTOO s.
fascinating arnt they??
a monumentous help from the daughter of the coolest mother on this side of the ganges made the impossible seem passe.
an almost divine co-incidence featuring a fellow poet with confused roots and a failing eye-sight and a proud anglo/mexican with a very impressive past hailing from the land of the gang with tattoos,a relationship in tatters and pretty much nothing else.
all of the above introduced me to the world of serious inking.
the needles,the ink,the smell of dried blood,the art.
its a ride.wild one.
i learn fast.n this time i have impressed myself.
the best thing about tattoos is its like skulpture...its there to stay,the parmanency [if there is such a word] is intriguing,satiating.

the gap between the words is slowly decreasing.
i can feel it.

running thru the coloured pages of som1 elses blog ,that common yet long forgotten urge 2 write forced itself into my barren brain....
isnt it strange how keyboards have replaced ink and pens while a 15inch LCD screen glamourizes the pale paper...
well im not here to go against the tide...at times its juz simple fun 2 get blown n flown with it...and thts wht i decide 2 do....but just for 2night.

FRIENDS -- aah the very word brings back memories,some fond ,most others screaming BE CAREFUL NEXT TIME.
its true there is a new tide ,new people are being thrown on d god-forsaken land of ma isle...
good people,beautiful people,talented people,small people,large people.
some claim they are here to help...
but when did i ask for it???
some argue that i never had to...
havent i heard that before???
BE CAREFUL...

a power-packed bird in hibernation.
an alcoholic glutton who thinks she can fool the planet.
an honest grasshopper who shaves where one shouldnt shave.
a ditto mouse who burns rubber.
a star couple starry-eyed in their star-studded stardom.
a supremely talented slide-show stopper.
an exceptional singer who talks like she has 2 board a F-16.
a lioness who wins the best gujj in d world award.
a very small,extremely chaotic but un-ignorable lemur on a mission to save the world.

did i miss anyone??
thats a stupid question ABHI, how can u not remember that you NEVER miss anyone.
not even a thought that wants to be forgiven and forgotten like various others before and after it.
you werent MADE that way!!
OR
probably you were MADE that way!!

questions and answeres have switched roles and i, as a mute audience ,am at a loss.
but havent i felt that before??

questions...questions...
when will they stop torturing me??
another question.
arrrrgggghhhhh.

people will go to any extent to make themselves noticed,accepted,appreciated,applauded.
YES,i have seen few of them,the others have seccessfully managed to powder their faces.
a megalomaniac who competes against a hawaiian guitar in the measure of hollowness.
an artist that never was.
a poet whose poems served as a source of cheap humour to the extensive population of road-terriers in heat.


but i am not here to talk about them...they are not worth talkin bout,even a flicker of a thought is a loss.

coming back to the new tide --
its too soon to judge them
they all are nice,good,fresh and all that.
but so is evryone else???
or so it seems,ALWAYZ.
so...
BE CAREFUL...

the lil one slapped one adjective on the other.
but i dont blame her.people are judgemental.thts wht makes us human.the fatal fruit burdened us with the cursed power to judge and so we use and abuse it.thats normal.thats human.

i would rather choose indifference.
i would rather choose to forget,not forgive,mind you...just forget.
an act that took years,tears and an obscene number or innocent,mutilated souls to perfect.
SORRY but i NEEDED it.

i would write,i will have to.
i dont care if a certain OSHO thinks its vomit.its my puke newyz and the lech is buried sixteen feet under or burnt into thin air.so who cares.
i would write bout those years of confusion.
i would write bout you and you and you and you and you and you too.
i would write bout you all.
i would write bout you three too.
it might not make sense,but thats the point.
its my turn 2 serve questions.
its my turn to FEED.

I WUD LIKE 2 WRITE SOMTHN 2NITE

nethn,absolutely nethn

a poem
a para
an essay
a small note

nethn,absolutely nethn wud do

but im scared
tht i wont deliver justice 2 wht i might write 2nite
im juz too strained
too tired
dry drained
all this motion
has stressed my language
and 2nite i am without a rhyme
without a word tht cud have emoted
but i wud have liked 2 write 2nite

nethn ,absolutely nethn
but i decide 2 stay awake
and WAIT....

stop expecting so much from me.....

all of u...

i am not here to deliver

to answer

to explain

to be held responsible...

i kno....u all wud like me 2 be a lil of evrythn above...

but u all NEED 2 understand i wasnt made tht way...

i have no answers....
so stop questioning me...


i dont have any explanation
so stop expecting one...

i cannot CANNOT be responsible
so PLEASE,i beg u,PLEASE

lemme BREATHE....dont smother me with those wide eyes filled to d brim with
expectations in all shapes ,sizes n forms....

lemme BREATHE PLEASE....