DOLL'S HOUSE
coming soon
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
"freedom comes at a very high price,as high as slavery...only difference being we pay with pleasure and smile ,even if that smile is dimmed with tears" - paulo coelho
FREEDOM is a very powerful word...
to understand the might of this word battles have been fought,blood has been spilled like water,nations have been destroyed and then re-created to be destroyed again,people have been
slaughtered like cattle,women ravaged and children orphaned.
the clouds have been showered with crimson droplets.
sweat has moistened the land below.
and hope has humbled the brute force of the high n mighty.
FREEDOM has divided nations.
60 years of independence from the yoke of the colonial chariot.
rise of a democratic nation.
an economy on steroids.
a future super power.
the RIDE is destined to replace the RIDER.
but if we believe that we all have our own small worlds ,our own small nations with our own small population and associated problems then we cannot disregard the fact tht there is a constant war within tht small world of ours for a FREEDOM which we dont always understand but still pursue with an amazing vigour.
i have been racing against popular beliefs,growing parental expectations,foolish peers equally mindless pressure,fear,hatred,confusion,dimmed violence and the realization of the futility of relationships ,since this word has drilled itself into my mind/soul.
FREEDOM.
NO,its not about doin 100kmph on a freeway with the stubborn wind swooshing past ur ears and screaming for MORE ,MORE and MORE like some cheap pornstar with DDD assets.
NO,its not about rolling tht joint,popping tht pill,snorting tht stash
NO,its not bout hoisting tht flag
NO,its not about screaming at ur folks for showing their concern [or encroaching ur personal space]as to why those red lettered words in the school diary sez SUSPENDED FOR 2 WEEKS FOR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR.
NO,its not about the PINK FLOYD's,DYLAN's,MORRISON's,COBAIN's OR FOSSIL's [ for my less colonised cousins]
NO,its not about ur dad's credit card or tht obese bank balance
NO,its definately not about tht hairstyle,tht TATTOO,tht bike, and tht cute ,dumb thing who thinks how exciting it wud be 2 be with som1 like U.
FREEDOM.
And we thought we understood the word.
FREEDOM is a very powerful word...
to understand the might of this word battles have been fought,blood has been spilled like water,nations have been destroyed and then re-created to be destroyed again,people have been
slaughtered like cattle,women ravaged and children orphaned.
the clouds have been showered with crimson droplets.
sweat has moistened the land below.
and hope has humbled the brute force of the high n mighty.
FREEDOM has divided nations.
60 years of independence from the yoke of the colonial chariot.
rise of a democratic nation.
an economy on steroids.
a future super power.
the RIDE is destined to replace the RIDER.
but if we believe that we all have our own small worlds ,our own small nations with our own small population and associated problems then we cannot disregard the fact tht there is a constant war within tht small world of ours for a FREEDOM which we dont always understand but still pursue with an amazing vigour.
i have been racing against popular beliefs,growing parental expectations,foolish peers equally mindless pressure,fear,hatred,confusion,dimmed violence and the realization of the futility of relationships ,since this word has drilled itself into my mind/soul.
FREEDOM.
NO,its not about doin 100kmph on a freeway with the stubborn wind swooshing past ur ears and screaming for MORE ,MORE and MORE like some cheap pornstar with DDD assets.
NO,its not about rolling tht joint,popping tht pill,snorting tht stash
NO,its not bout hoisting tht flag
NO,its not about screaming at ur folks for showing their concern [or encroaching ur personal space]as to why those red lettered words in the school diary sez SUSPENDED FOR 2 WEEKS FOR INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR.
NO,its not about the PINK FLOYD's,DYLAN's,MORRISON's,COBAIN's OR FOSSIL's [ for my less colonised cousins]
NO,its not about ur dad's credit card or tht obese bank balance
NO,its definately not about tht hairstyle,tht TATTOO,tht bike, and tht cute ,dumb thing who thinks how exciting it wud be 2 be with som1 like U.
FREEDOM.
And we thought we understood the word.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
The CARNIVAL is over.
5 days came and went with a pace tht would shame a 1800 cc ROADSTER,
or better my 1981 ROYAL ENFIELD 350 [restored] on their best days.
it has always been like that.
it has been always like tht with vacations,smiles and good-times.
they are always in a hurry to leave.
i love the pujo...i love the smell of the air ,the light aroma of the incense,the dhak er awaj,
the lights,the food [which is not always good or cheap],meeting old friends [even the ones you dont want to meet],
searching through the dazed hundreds of MAD--OX for tht 1 special person [it ws almost a ritual for us 2 meet at the same place
,on the same occasion and say the exact same things since we parted ways....till last year]
*sigh*
i ws never particularly interested in the pandals or the protimas they housed...
im still not...
but its evrythn else tht is so enthralling.
even a guy sporting pink polka dotted shirt with white trousers,red boots and aviators at 3am in the night
dosnt seem outta place or outta this world.
thts d magic...n u have to feel it to understand...or better just FEEL...dnt try to UNDERSTAND
PUJO s spelled new clothes [ lots of them],heavy pocket money,cap-pistols [designed as per the
newest SANJAY DUTT movie],n lotsa ice-cream for me when i ws an adolescent.
as the calendars rolled n i got uglier and goofier cap-pistols were replaced by
night outs with friends ,getting sloshed on cheap whiskey mixed with coke in a running
TATA SUMO,day-outs with the fairer species,lunch,PROTIMA--DARSHAN [if u kno wht i mean],madox,
dope,boot-cuts,hair gel and deodorants.
this PUJO ws different...
something has definately changed...
i felt curiously satisfied with 1 jeans and 1 tshirt.
didnt feel the urge to drink [ though NOBOMI nights pub-hoping ws fun ]
and d MAD crowd at MADOX could hardly retain its power of enchantment...for i felt more at ease
being at XAVIERS during the closing day of THE CANDLE LIGHT VIGIL FOR RIZ than i ever did in any pandal.
Inspite of my mom's incessant bickering my hair didnt seem to be needing the immediate attention
of the GUTKHA-CHEWING NAPIT of the nearest saloon.
YES...something has definitely changed.
im still trying to understand it...
will let u kno as soon as i do.
5 days came and went with a pace tht would shame a 1800 cc ROADSTER,
or better my 1981 ROYAL ENFIELD 350 [restored] on their best days.
it has always been like that.
it has been always like tht with vacations,smiles and good-times.
they are always in a hurry to leave.
i love the pujo...i love the smell of the air ,the light aroma of the incense,the dhak er awaj,
the lights,the food [which is not always good or cheap],meeting old friends [even the ones you dont want to meet],
searching through the dazed hundreds of MAD--OX for tht 1 special person [it ws almost a ritual for us 2 meet at the same place
,on the same occasion and say the exact same things since we parted ways....till last year]
*sigh*
i ws never particularly interested in the pandals or the protimas they housed...
im still not...
but its evrythn else tht is so enthralling.
even a guy sporting pink polka dotted shirt with white trousers,red boots and aviators at 3am in the night
dosnt seem outta place or outta this world.
thts d magic...n u have to feel it to understand...or better just FEEL...dnt try to UNDERSTAND
PUJO s spelled new clothes [ lots of them],heavy pocket money,cap-pistols [designed as per the
newest SANJAY DUTT movie],n lotsa ice-cream for me when i ws an adolescent.
as the calendars rolled n i got uglier and goofier cap-pistols were replaced by
night outs with friends ,getting sloshed on cheap whiskey mixed with coke in a running
TATA SUMO,day-outs with the fairer species,lunch,PROTIMA--DARSHAN [if u kno wht i mean],madox,
dope,boot-cuts,hair gel and deodorants.
this PUJO ws different...
something has definately changed...
i felt curiously satisfied with 1 jeans and 1 tshirt.
didnt feel the urge to drink [ though NOBOMI nights pub-hoping ws fun ]
and d MAD crowd at MADOX could hardly retain its power of enchantment...for i felt more at ease
being at XAVIERS during the closing day of THE CANDLE LIGHT VIGIL FOR RIZ than i ever did in any pandal.
Inspite of my mom's incessant bickering my hair didnt seem to be needing the immediate attention
of the GUTKHA-CHEWING NAPIT of the nearest saloon.
YES...something has definitely changed.
im still trying to understand it...
will let u kno as soon as i do.
Friday, October 12, 2007
FOR RIZWANUR REHMAN
... an individual who died for a belief
My candle is burning bright
everynight it burns a little more
a little fast
with a little light
My candle is burning bright
There are masks around too
with camera craving smiles
and eyes polished white
Things said and done
for the shutterbugs plight
But my candle is burning bright
on the fire in your heart
through the tear in your eyes
I see my world
where love never dies
where a candle can wipe
cloud filled skies
A candle
My candle which is still burning bright
against the wind
against the tide
against your law
behind which you hide
fighting the fight
and lighting the night
Is my candle
that is burning bright...
Monday, October 01, 2007
tell me nothn is for ever
somone....anyone
i cant go on hating myself forever...
my visit to the asylum will be preponed by decades then...
i dont want tht ,i really dont...
no nothng is for ever....
this is just a phase and it HAS to pass away like the millions others before.
how wud u feel if u KNOW that there will be somone in this ridiculously happy world who would always HATE you for what u are...
NO not a sad resultant of a relationship gone terribly wrong
NOT an x girl friend who wanted to possess the one thing i was not allowed to give -- MYSELF
an ANGEL...
ARIANA...
im curious....how would you feel if u were hated by an angel...wudnt tht make you fell like a demon??
wudnt u start hating yourslf for being one??
how will u escape this choking feeling of being the disgraced one??
is there any escape at all??
QUESTIONS again
Oh! how i hated them once
how i hate em all the more ,now.
how i will ALWAYS hate them,forever.
but thts not possible ,is it??
nothing is forever...NOTHING.
somone....anyone
i cant go on hating myself forever...
my visit to the asylum will be preponed by decades then...
i dont want tht ,i really dont...
no nothng is for ever....
this is just a phase and it HAS to pass away like the millions others before.
how wud u feel if u KNOW that there will be somone in this ridiculously happy world who would always HATE you for what u are...
NO not a sad resultant of a relationship gone terribly wrong
NOT an x girl friend who wanted to possess the one thing i was not allowed to give -- MYSELF
an ANGEL...
ARIANA...
im curious....how would you feel if u were hated by an angel...wudnt tht make you fell like a demon??
wudnt u start hating yourslf for being one??
how will u escape this choking feeling of being the disgraced one??
is there any escape at all??
QUESTIONS again
Oh! how i hated them once
how i hate em all the more ,now.
how i will ALWAYS hate them,forever.
but thts not possible ,is it??
nothing is forever...NOTHING.
PEACE - is tht super hot damsel in school who would refuse to acknowledge your very existence coz u ride a HERCULES MTB and not get baby lapped in a long black four wheel drive sedan,coz SHE would always elude you,excite you,tease you,tear you apart.
LIFE was meant to be simple ,wasnt it???
we are wht we are coz of the moments we had survived as juvenile wisecracks
moments we love to hate now that we have MATURED into juvenile delinquents
moments we wish never existed
moments....moments...moments
moments that never were...
moments when u wished for a moment of peace
do u remember of a moment of absolute nothingness
no friends [fortunately],no alcohol,no drugs,no blood,no smell,no hunger,no hunger,no dreams,no sleep
nothing absolutely nothing
no parents,no propaganda,no desires,no lust
no FEELINGS
yes...
no FEELINGS...nothing
no love,hate,loathe,fear
nothing....just nothing...
except an opaque screen straing back at you with its wiry fingers pointed towards you asking all the questions you had successfully managed to evade for 2 decades and 2 years.
is this a disease...are YOU infected??
i kno for a fact this cannot be hereditary
congenital??
thts a possibility
i just figured my next TATTOO...
il have a MOTH on my back...this altar is full of candles i can see...
its gonna be fun...
dnt follow me...
LIFE was meant to be simple ,wasnt it???
we are wht we are coz of the moments we had survived as juvenile wisecracks
moments we love to hate now that we have MATURED into juvenile delinquents
moments we wish never existed
moments....moments...moments
moments that never were...
moments when u wished for a moment of peace
do u remember of a moment of absolute nothingness
no friends [fortunately],no alcohol,no drugs,no blood,no smell,no hunger,no hunger,no dreams,no sleep
nothing absolutely nothing
no parents,no propaganda,no desires,no lust
no FEELINGS
yes...
no FEELINGS...nothing
no love,hate,loathe,fear
nothing....just nothing...
except an opaque screen straing back at you with its wiry fingers pointed towards you asking all the questions you had successfully managed to evade for 2 decades and 2 years.
is this a disease...are YOU infected??
i kno for a fact this cannot be hereditary
congenital??
thts a possibility
i just figured my next TATTOO...
il have a MOTH on my back...this altar is full of candles i can see...
its gonna be fun...
dnt follow me...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)